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The ability to walk away is the single greatest power you can have in business, dating, and life

The ability to walk away (TATWA) is fundamental in leading a happy, healthy, and fruitful life. TATWA has applications with almost every single human interaction we engage in, especially in business and dating. When I was shopping for a car and the seller refused to offer a fair price, I walked away and negotiated with other sellers on Craigslist until I struck a deal I felt comfortable with. This saved me a few thousand dollars and a potential multitude of headaches dealing with repairs. When I was on a first date and the other person told me that “all religions are bullshit” after I ask them if they heard of the Vedanta Society in Providence Rhode Island (Vedanta isn’t even a religion, it’s a Hindu philosophy), I politely got up, told them that wasn’t a debate I was willing to have, and left. The ironic thing is that I’m agnostic, but even I believe religions and philosophies deserve a basic level of decency and respect.

TATWA demonstrates strength, resolve, and value. If a boundary is crossed and there are no consequences, it sets a dangerous precedent that boundaries are meaningless, and that leads to potential abuse and being taken advantage of. If a person or group sees and understands that we have TATWA, they’ll be eager and encouraged to respect us. TATWA can be cultivated, and is extremely hard if not impossible to bluff. TATWA comes from both inner and outer strength. Living a healthy lifestyle, incorporating abundance of opportunity in our lives, and being self-reliant when it’s strategic to do so all lead to TATWA.

But living a healthy lifestyle is not enough. TATWA is a mental state, a paradigm with which we live our lives and recognize we deserve to experience a healthy life. TATWA is paramount to our mental health and well-being. With TATWA we’re in control of our own destiny. Without TATWA, we’re left vulnerable to the whims of a third party. TATWA is like investing in stocks: some will win, some will lose, but ultimately we have the ability to buy and sell whatever and whenever we want. And because with TATWA we are allowed this power and ability, we’re left stronger, more capable, and better off.

TATWA wins negotiations. If we have TATWA, we have leverage, and we have the ability to not succumb to the other side’s harsh demands. Without TATWA, we’re a sitting duck, waiting to be taken advantage of. Good negotiators never enter negotiations without TATWA. Without TATWA, we’re doomed to concede all our leverage.

TATWA allows us to bounce back and recover fast. If something does or doesn’t work out is not important, with TATWA we’re always building our arsenal of value without depending or relying on others. Regardless of if something goes well or doesn’t work out, TATWA is a neutral force that’s just about maximizing our freedom and flexibility. TATWA displays inner strength and resolve. Performing TATWA cuts out the unhealthy in our lives, preserves our dignity, and ultimately leads to better results.

TATWA is sets up healthy boundaries and shields us from potential abuse. In business and negotiation, when we display TATWA, we let the other parties know that disrespect is a non-starter, and that if we aren’t treated with the decency we deserve, then we always have the option of going elsewhere. In dating, TATWA promotes happiness while discourages disagreement. Even the physical act of leaving the room during an argument is a version of TATWA, and allows tensions to diffuse so that reconciliation is possible.

TATWA is an inherently attractive quality we can own in business as well as in dating. In business, a person who commands TATWA has a level of recognition that burgeons influence and authority. In dating, TATWA is the opposite of neediness and clinginess. We want what we cannot have, and when someone shows they have TATWA, they also show that their affection has to be earned, and isn’t just given out freely. And when we have to work for something, we inherently appreciate it more than had it been dropped at our feet.

Conclusion: TATWA is applicable for both men and women, as well as meant to help us thrive in business, dating, and life in general. TATWA is an ability that empowers the individual, and allows for better options and more opportunities in life. With TATWA, we can cycle through the bad and focus on the good. TATWA brings us joy and happiness in our business transactions, our dating experiences, and our lives in general. With TATWA, we’re allowed to pursue our full potential and attract those people that will lead us to succeed.

 

 

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Always aim to be 99.7% perfect, not 100%

It’s almost always better to strive not for 100% perfection but for 99.7% completion. At Facebook, they work by the mantra that “done is better than perfect”. The implications of this are huge: when they create a product, they don’t waste time perfecting it and fixing every bug. Instead they get it out there as fast as they can appropriately accomplish in order to be able to invest their time into the next project. Also, I learned growing up that in Ancient Greece, whenever a building was completed, the architect would create a tiny dent on one of the columns so as to not anger the Gods by making a perfect masterpiece which would’ve been viewed as a threat and challenge to those deities living on Mount Olympus. When I first heard this story I thought it was stupid and I was surprised this practice came from the Ancient Greeks, a people who gave us democracy, philosophy, and baklava. But as I grew older, I realized there really is merit to this odd practice. Appeasing the Gods hid the psychology behind being 99.7% instead of 100%: striving for 100% risks negative consequences and side effects, including obsession, wasting time, backtracking, and frustration. But most importantly, so many of these endeavors we apply ourselves too are actually impossible to attain 100%, for even if we happen to achieve 100% we won’t even know it, and instead, we’re left consuming ourselves with something that has no end.

The monkey and the peas

A monkey was carrying two handful of peas. One little pea dropped out. He tried to pick it up, and spilt twenty. He tried to pick up the twenty, and spilt them all. Then he lost his temper, scattered the peas in all directions, and ran away.

-Fables, Leo Tolstoy

99.7% is the sweet spot

In high school statistics class, we learned the 68-95-99.7 rule for normal distributions. A normal distribution is shaped like a bell curve. The 68-95-99.7 rule means that approximately 68% of the observations fall within 1 standard deviation of the mean, approximately 95% of observations fall within 2 standard deviations of the mean, and approximately 99.7% of observations fall within 3 standard deviations of the mean. The implication of this in statistics is that it’s empirically useful to treat 99.7% probability as near certainty. While a direct correlation cannot necessarily tie this with how we decide to live our lives, it’s representative of a bigger lesson: working with 99.7% of something is even better than engaging in the fruitless endeavor of reaching 100%.

Empirical_Rule-2

With most projects we work on, attaining 100% is quite literally a never-ending process and a wild goose chase that risks consuming more of our lives than appropriate. As stated earlier, we may have even accomplished 100%, but we don’t know it because we’re never sure if there’s something else we could’ve done better. We become mired in a downward spiral that eventually backfires and becomes self-destructive. By attaining 99.7%, we allow ourselves the freedom to feel confident we came up with a fantastic product, as well as permit ourselves the ability to disengage from it.

Many people see themselves as perfectionists and keep working away at something even when they pass the point where minor improvements they make simply aren’t worth their time anymore. Time is the most valuable, limited, and powerful resource on the planet, for no matter if we are a billionaire or a baby, the amount of time we are alive is limited and deviates relatively little from an average life expectancy. Therefore, reaching perfection might just mean not being perfect, but instead may mean being 99.7% there. By leaving an insignificant room for error, we enable ourselves to invest our time into stuff that’s more important.

Conclusion

Obsessing over being 100% perfect and going through countless revisions leads, to stress, strain, and losing the ability to be satisfied. When we do something and allow for one or two mistakes, we become liberated from our work and gain the freedom to move on. As seen in statistics, 99.7% is enough to be considered the most meaningful amount we should work with. If we strive and obtain 100%, we risk being struck by a lightning bolt from Zeus. Therefore, the best way of going about anything in life is to aim for 99.7% perfection, which is even better than being 100% perfect.